Now he's dead what are we supposed to do?

No celebrations in this post. We all know that Michael Jackson was a star, the brightest star of pop. I can assume he has invented the pop. No, this post is about us, the grief we all feel for this world is empty because he's dead.

I remember the very first time I saw him on TV I was 13. At that time there was no youtube, no PCs in our homes, there was nothing you can do to see something again: once it was gone, it was gone. If you missed an episode of your favorite TV series there was no chance to see it, ever.

I saw the "Say say say" video on the TV on a Sunday afternoon. I realized I was looking at something epical and that I won't ever be able again to experience anything comparable again in my life. A bittersweet sensation held my heart, a sense of desire and despair. Who was this singer that glanced at me through the TV screen? I had to see him again, I had to have his records. I have passed from Barbies to Michael Jackson and adult music in 3 minutes.

I remember that I videotaped the whole "Thriller" video for my friends and we watched it on my 14th birthday party. None of them had a videotape system at home, I felt like the heroin that brought Michael Jackson in their lives. My Facebook contacts still remember that birthday party.

The next singular moment of my life that MJ was an inspiration is when I was 21. I drove to the University at 6 a.m. every morning listening to Stranger in Moscow again and again. That sense of grey emptiness, of wet loneliness was perfect for those mornings where my future could be whatever I wanted but I did not know what I wanted.

Two weeks ago I went to a record store and I was looking at Michael Jackson special editions of all his hits wondering if I should buy something or not. I thought he would have always been there, forever, there was still time. Nope.

I loved every single note that he sang for us. I maybe could not love the man, who cares, but I really loved the artist. He was the greatest and we all miss him. Share your thoughts, if you want, or maybe share a prayer.

I miss Michael Jackson. Now that he's dead, what am I supposed to do?

on the Internet:

Michael Jackson on Amazon
www.michaeljackson.com
RIP Michael Jackson group on Facebook
image results for Michael Jackson on Google
Video results for Michael Jakson
Michael Jackson profile at imdb.org